Learn me

Julie and her dad were having multigrain cereal for breakfast containing rolled oats, flaxseed, sesame seeds, walnuts, almonds, dried cranberries, currants, nutmeg, and honey.

‘God! I hate cranberries.’ Dad said and kept separating them from his bowl. He noticed Julie not separating anything from her bowl. ‘Aren’t you allergic to almonds or something?’

‘What does allergic mean?’ Julie was five.

‘Nevermind.’

Julie was having her breakfast quietly. Julie, not separating anything from the bowl made her dad mildly infuriating.

Dad continued. ‘I found you the other day while having cake on your friend’s birthday. You just.. finished eating the whole cake!’

Julie looked up chewing.

‘When I was a kid. I remember carefully separating the shredded and toasted coconut from my cake. God! That just makes the experience super awful *rolling eyes*’.

She kept listening.

‘My mom used to make everything very special for me. She made me pick the ingredients for my birthday cake very carefully. She made me feel very special. I want you to feel special too. Because you are special.’

‘Mm.’ Julie replied looking down at her bowl again.

‘Do you understand at all what I’m saying?’

Julie shook her head.

‘Why are you like this? You embarrass me in the get-togethers. You... *reduces voice* You eat like how poor girls eat!’ He said looking worried. ‘Are you poor?’ He asked.

‘No’

‘Good. Okay. Let's do something.’

Julie listened.

‘Look carefully at your bowl and tell me the ingredients that you like the most’

‘Um..’ Julie inspected the bowl with her spoon. He waited patiently showing concern. She said, ‘I like the cranberries.’

‘There you go. Ahaan. What else?’

‘I like this *shows rolled oats in her spoon* then… almonds… walnuts…’

‘What else?’

She kept stirring the bowl. She could not recognize much else.

‘I asked what else Julie?’ He asked with a firm voice.

Julie looked up a bit frightened.

‘Come here baby. Let me teach you.’ He took over the spoon. ‘Look at this? This is flaxseed. Taste this and tell me how you feel. Show thumbs-up if you like it. Thumbs-down if you don’t.’

Julie chewed that carefully. ‘Umm… It tastes… different.’

He signaled her to thumbs-up or thumbs-down.

‘Mmm? I don’t know.’

That was a facepalm for him. ‘Let me make it simple for you. Thumbs up if you want to eat it every day. Thumbs-down otherwise.’

Julie thumbs-down-ed.

Dad’s face brightened ‘That’s my girl! Now what should we do?’ he asked keeping his mouth open in anticipation and excitement.

Julie separated the flaxseed out of her bowl onto the separator plate.

‘Aww… That’s my girl!’ Dad screeched in joy and kissed her forehead.

Julie laughed.

‘So, what would you do the next time you come across flax seeds?’

‘Um... I’d say, God! It’s baaad!’ Julie said loud and laughed.

‘Yea… That’s it. God! It's aa..wful! URGHHH!!!’ Dad grunted rolling his eyes.

Twenty years later.

‘There are 2 major issues with this bouquet. Can you spot them?’ Julie asked her husband returning him the bouquet with an awkward face.

‘What issues Julie?’ He inspected the flower bouquet.

‘Look at it. Let me see if you can find them yourself.’

‘They are freshly plucked. They look good. *sniffs* They smell good. I don’t see a problem, honey.’

‘You don’t see a problem? URGHH!’ Julie rolled her eyes.

‘…’

‘First, I prefer flowers plucked three to four hours back. Not before. Certainly not after. That’s when they are pristine. The freshness of this bouquet makes me puke.’

‘…’

‘Second, Purple makes my stomach upset and there are *counts* four purple flowers in the bouquet.’ She looked at him with questioning eyes.

‘…’

‘So? When are you gonna learn me, Richard? When are you gonna learn me?’ Julie asked with a helplessly depressing tone.

‘…’

The End.